Monday, October 10, 2005

Socializing with the correct group

As we are gliding around in this society there are times, we are pressure or coax into doing things that we do not like. During school, I remember boys would visit the gents in groups. They will say “Jom, lets go to the Loo”. I am not sure how and where they learn that all humans have the same bladder size. Or they prefer to rough it out together at the urinary bowl with shoulders rubbing each other and their legs spread apart aiming at a hole. Wouldn’t it be fun if we count to three and wee wee at the same time and check who last the longest?

As we graduate from our schools or university we are being tossed into adulthood and independence but we still tend to stick to certain group of colleagues. I guess it could be the animal instincts in us that prompt us to do it. It could be that we feel safer in groups or it could be the way most company are structured. That is you will normally follow a senior to learn the “trade” but you tend to stick to a more junior group of colleague. No one in their sound mind would like to join the senior group in the first few months, as they are earn and spend more and they are the one who “torture and grill you” every moment you are in the office hence you will prefer to join a group who would curse and gossip about them during lunch time over a plate of mee goreng.

I guess to be able to stand in this society you will need to be linked to certain groups. This is what I called “exposure”. If you join the wrong group you might get less increment, bonuses and slower rise in the career ladder. For example if you worked in a big company whereby there are more than 1 thousand staff, hence the group that you go out with during lunch and happy hour is very important. It is the same as product placement in a movie. You will need to “broadcast” your talent to a certain group of staff who is close to “that person” who has the authority to decide the additional $$$. Why? If not how? Do you think big company have a good appraisal system? Just imagine by the time the news of your achievement reach the correct person it has turned to be another person achievement.

This applies to the circle of friends that you hang out with, be it ex colleague, ex school mates, neighbours or etc. Someone once told me this, it does not matter if you are smart or not but as long as you know someone who is and who has “make it”, things will go your way. If you know someone who knows someone who is in “High Places” you might get richer faster that most of us who only know someone who only know someone in “Low Places”. Do you know why I am still blogging here and sitting in a below 200K apartment instead of sitting in a bungalow watching some adults beating a white ball in a golf course and sipping bird nest? Yeap, I belong to the later group, the group who buy CD in Pasar Malam, who eat breakfast in KopiTiam and who wear pagoda singlet to sleep….the group that are stuck in the middle.

14 comments:

dreaming-neko said...

you know, i only have 3 kinds of friends too: rich friends (though i'm poor), good-looking friends (though i'm just an average joe), and lonely people (that's me)... but such is life.

leecs said...

pak soo, u r in the 'higher group' liao!!!
u decide ur own increment and benefit...who dare to challenge you?!!?!!

like i said before, u r like the v12 engine to the company, sorry v11 only (but still powerful)

how's things pak, didnt get to call you when back to KL....too much activities then....

PaT said...

sighayee!!

I agree having contacts are very important when it comes getting the best deals/meals... Oh well...
But those kinda high-end people aren't the best to mingle around with right!!

www.xanga.com/ches_ca said...

i miss my high school days. if i'd be allowed to go back, i'd say yes.

Selba said...

Hahaha.... well, agreed with you :)

De Book Worm said...

But guess who is happier buying CD in Pasar Malam, eating breakfast in Kopitiam and wearing pagoda singlet to sleep? Being contented is one of the keys to being truly happy. :)

Lrong said...

Am not too much into buying CDs or wearing pagoda singlets, but when I eat tosai bawang in my favorite KopiTiam, I feel like I am seventh heaven...

SooHK said...

Dreaming Neko, I think you have a great life...

LeeCS, V11...hahaha, most things you say is not so true except one thing, who dare to challenge this dead wood...hahaha.. Its ok, we will see each other one when you are back in Malaysia for good, to me if you are back in malaysia temporary spend more time with your family. That is important....

Pat, yeap you are right they have some certain character, that why they can make it....

Chesca, yeap when we are in high school we hope to goes out to the world and work. When we are there we want to relive our high school life...

Selba, oh thanks..

De book worm, yeap you are right....

Lrong, small little thing in life that will makes us happy....

soohy said...

The influence of friends is powerful. It is best to have good people as friends. It does not matter which group they are from as long as they are good people

5xmom ~chanlilian.net~ said...

And you know what? Even bloggers go in group. Human nature, I guess.

BTW, I agree with Lrong and Bkworm. Doesn't matter which group as long as we are happy inside!

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